


So are you afraid of the dark?

by runningfromrealitytoanime



Series: The domestic life of an onigiri seller and his editor [6]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Haunted House, M/M, akaashi being a supportive boyfriend, boys getting scared shitless, i hate horror films, someone will piss in their pants
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-28
Updated: 2020-06-28
Packaged: 2021-03-04 05:08:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24964252
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/runningfromrealitytoanime/pseuds/runningfromrealitytoanime
Summary: What better way to have a date with your crazy twin and his boyfriend at the scariest haunted house in the country?
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Miya Osamu, Miya Atsumu/Suna Rintarou
Series: The domestic life of an onigiri seller and his editor [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1799782
Comments: 6
Kudos: 59





	So are you afraid of the dark?

**Author's Note:**

> I read a super hilarious fic of the Haikyuu boys going into a haunted house and getting scared shitless and thought just how crazy Atsumu and Suna would be acting inside if they were ever thrown into one. I don't watch any horror films (even the poster of one is enough to scare me shitless) so this might not be as scary as most of you might expect. Just read it for shits and giggles.

When the younger half of the Miya twins invites his older twin on a double date with their boyfriends, Osamu knew that this was going to be the worst decision ever made.

He hated horror films, let alone the sight of anything that screamed horror like the sight of lights flickering in the corridors at night (and that spooked the living daylights out of him whenever they had to go for nationals as their coach always seemed to love booking hotels that screamed “Yo, people! We have tons of ghosts in here so come and stay here! We’ve got creepy old dolls lurking in every corner in glass cabinets! Free entry!). Osamu shuddered as he stood at the front of the haunted house and of course, being the conniving idiotic bastard he was, Atsumu just had to drag him to the scariest haunted house in the entirety of Japan, if not in entire Asia.

Osamu could already feel his fingers twitching as he stared up at the haunted house in front of him. someone just had enough money and time to turn an entire freaking mansion that could probably buy around 3 of his apartments into a freaking haunted house to scare the living shit of patrons such as themselves. The front of it was a Victorian style look, with the windows dark with the occasional light flickering inside. Some parts of the windows had been splashed with what suspiciously looked like blood, adding to Osamu wishing he could turn tail and run and hide beneath his blankets holding onto his giant onigiri plushie.

“Hey, are you alright?” a voice piped up as his fingers were given a light squeeze. Akaashi Keiji, the ever caring and kind boyfriend whose free day of the week was going to be spent seeing his boyfriend pissing his pants had agreed to come with him. Osamu had silently prayed hard that his boyfriend would not agree to the trip but lo and behold, here they were with the two idiots who had dragged them into this shit in the first place.

Atsumu was standing in front of him with a shit-eating grin on his face while Suna looked torn between wanting to knock his boyfriend out or just dragging him into the haunted house and begin whatever weird shit they had planned out. The two of them had the worst case of PDA, often making out in a variety of places with oh so included, at one given point of time, the toilets in the stadium where they had to play a game against each other and more than once in Osamu’s own restaurants (emphasis on the restaurants. It wasn’t just one branch in Japan they decided to tarnish with their shit).

He swore they needed to see a psychiatrist given how often they were jumping onto each other like rabbits.

Suna was supposed to be his best friend to boot but ever since his twin had swept him up under some stupid ass love potion he must have concocted or deal he made with the devil, he had been turned into a maniac who only craved Atsumu and Atsumu’s body. It was a miracle the two of them could even focus on playing volleyball when any time off the court was spent in the bedroom or any available surface for them to go at it.

“Why am I doing this to myself?” Osamu groaned as Atsumu gave him a shit-eating smirk, “Don’t worry! You’ll be fine! Just a few scares here and there and you will be done!”

“You didn’t even pay for me, you damned bastard!” he snapped as Atsumu blew him a raspberry, “I have better things to spend my money on then my crybaby of a big twin.”

“Why you little…”

“Boys,” Akaashi sighed as he threaded his fingers with Osamu, stopping him from reaching out to punch the setter in the face. Even though the twins were both famous for both of their exploits, that still didn’t get them off the radar as being twins who would beat the living shit out of each other when given the chance. Suna would often just laugh and watch them go at it while Akaashi sighed and face palmed himself.

The Black Jackals setter smirked as the lady in the ticket counter called them forward, both volleyball players giving their tickets to her before being told the rules.

“Do not injure the actors or destroy anything on the property,” she rambled on, the bored look on her face not suiting the hellhole situated behind her as Atsumu grinned before making a gesture at Osamu, his twin sighing as Akaashi wondered out loud, “I wonder if they will even be sane enough to try and do something like that inside.”

“I guess we will find out,” Osamu grunted, pulling his cap closer onto his head as they were pushed forward to the main gates. The gates yawned open before them, Osamu gulping as Akaashi’s grip on his fingers tightened even more before turning to give him a peck on the cheek before he gave him a wink, “If you survive this without screaming, I will give you a good present once we’re home.”

Oh, the wonders of having someone like Akaashi as his boyfriend.

“Alright.., let’s do this,” Osamu muttered as he took a deep breath before both of them stepped into the house. They crossed the front porch before stepping through the double oak doors, a laugh echoing above their heads from a speaker as a woman crooned, “You’ve made a grave mistake. Welcome to your worse nightmare!”

The doors slammed shut behind them, Osamu stiffening as they were plunged into near darkness. Luckily for them, Akaashi held up his phone to light up the way, his hand still gripping onto Osamu’s as they walked in. The man didn't even look fazed at what happened, instead taking in their surroundings with mild enthusiasm. The hallways were trashed with what appeared to be broken glass and blood, remnants of torn clothes collecting dust. Osamu hadn’t done any reading on what the theme of the haunted house was supposed to be other than the fact it as supposed to scare the shit out of him.

The sign pointed them to go up the flight of stairs in front of them. A grand staircase branched off to the left and right, the metal shine having lost its light as they walked up. Osamu didn’t dare touch anything, Akaashi pointing out the architecture as though they were on a museum tour when they heard a tiny voice breaking from the top of the stairs.

“Mummy, is that you?” a little girl called out as lightning flashed from the windows. It lighted up the small figure standing on the top of the stairs, Osamu biting his lip to prevent himself from screaming when he saw it was a little girl who didn’t have any eyeballs. She was clutching onto a bloody doll, the thing barely holding itself together as the girl reached out to them, her fingers slowly detaching from themselves as she whimpered, “Mummy, I can’t see you. I want to hold you, mummy. I want to…”

Lightning flashed once more and Osamu nearly slammed into Akaashi’s chest. When they looked up, the girl was gone.

“Holy shit, how the hell did they do that?” Osamu groaned as they walked up the stairs. Osamu looked around for good measure just to make sure he hadn’t hallucinated as Akaashi tapped the ground with his foot, “Must have been a trap door. Interesting for them to have made a contraption such as this.” He turned to give Osamu a peck on the lips for good measure, the onigiri seller slowly regaining his colour as Akaashi smiled, “Come on. Let’s go.” Akaashi didn't seem to have been scared about the little girl at all, instead making sure his boyfriend was alright and still hadn't pissed himself. Osamu thanked the gods for blessing him with someone this kind in his life. 

The next route included a long corridor with lights flickering above their heads. Osamu gripped Akaashi for dear life as the lights went on and off every few seconds, barely lighting their way as Akaashi asked, “Osamu, are you afraid of the dark?”  
  


“What?! No! I mean, its just.. it reminds me of all those times we had to stay in those shit ass hotels during nationals. Coach always did have a knack for choosing houses that looked haunted,” Osamu shuddered as Akaashi chuckled, “If you’re here with me though, would you be afraid?”

“Keiji, I…” Osamu stuttered when they heard a pair of shouts ricocheting off the walls followed by a string of curses as a pair of feet ran off down the hall. Osamu didn’t have to be a genius to recognise who they belonged to, a snicker escaping from his lips as he laughed, “So much for trying to make out in front of the ghosts.”

“Those two can be such idiots,” Akaashi agreed as they trudged forward, Osamu having had forgotten much of his worries when he saw a large figure moving in front of them. The man had a chainsaw in his hands, the device whirring into life as Osamu let out a little squeak. The man sported a white mask covered with blood, his hands stained with the stuff as he walked towards them. what appeared to be intestines snaked around his waist like a belt along with a couple of fingers, Osamu already feeling like gagging as the man growled, “You will pay for hurting my family. You will pay.”

He pulled at the side of the chainsaw to make a loud whirring noise, bringing it above his head as the two of them ducked out of the way. Osamu knew it wasn’t the real thing but at the same time, the sound of it was so real and he swore he could even smell the metallic scent of blood. He held a hand on his mouth as Akaashi led him on, the boy squeezing his eyes shut until they finally reached the end of the corridor which opened into a different part of the house. Now for some reason, it looked like a doctor’s room, the place trashed and decrepit as the door slammed shut behind them.

“Holy shit that was mad,” Osamu groaned as he held his face in his hands. His body was shaking from all the adrenaline coursing through his veins, his hands shaking as he tried to find his footing. Akaashi gently moved to cage him in his arms, holding onto him tightly as he kissed him gently on the forehead. Slowly, Osamu began to calm down, the former setter’s warmth giving him strength as Akaashi whispered, “You’re doing so well, babe. You’re going to be fine.” He kissed Osamu one more time on the lips, this time with more tongue as Osamu whimpered into the kiss.

To hell that they were in a haunted house when his boyfriend is kissing him, he wasn’t going to say no.

The two of them clashed tongues as they kissed against the door. Osamu groaned as he rutted against Akaashi’s thigh, the man letting out a little snort as he kissed Osamy harder. He bit down on his lip as his hand raked across his shirt, pressing all the right areas to make Osamu whine as Osamu whispered, “What you wanna do it here?”

“Might as well, I was about to go crazy thinking of how you look so terrified during the first half of the tour,” Akaashi snickered, the glint in his eyes reminded Osamu of how the cool editor could really be a sadist if he wished to be. Akaashi’s hand was already set on his pants, Osamu wishing he could just slam him against the wall and make him scream his name when a voice coughed behind them.

“If you want to kiss and make out, please don’t do it here. I don’t want to have to clean it up more than I have to be here,” a voice drawled as Osamu let out a tiny shriek. A man dressed in a doctor’s costume stood in the middle of the room, a clipboard in his hand that had a suspicious large knife on it. he even had a scalpel perched in his ear, his brown eyes pulled into a frown as he ran his fingers through his hair.

“I thought doing this would be entertaining in scaring the shit out of people but why do people have to occasionally make out in a haunted house? What the hell is wrong with you?” he grunted as Osamu squinted his eyes. The boy looked very familiar, his sandy brown hair fluffy and nearly in the shape of a bowl-cut. An ID flashed on his chest, the name readable as Osamu gaped, “Hey, aren’t you Shiratorizawa’s setter?! Shirabu Kenjirou?”

The boy sighed as he scratched his hair, making it look messy and his face pulling into a bigger frown as he scowled, “I’m just doing this as a favour for Tendou. He promised me some money and I’m broke so don’t judge. I’m already a doctor in training anyways so why not play the part of a manic?” At that, he smirked as he reached into his pocket to pull out something before tossing it at them, Osamu catching it in his hand to find it to be rather slimy and gooey.

“You might want to get out of here. The next pair is due here in three minutes and I haven’t managed to scare the shit out of you so please get out,” Shirabu muttered as Osamu stared at his hand to feel something writhing in it. When he finally realised what it was, he tried not to scream as some light fell onto his palm, confirming his fears as Shirabu let out a snicker.

“I hope you like worms. That was my failsafe if I couldn’t scare the shit out of people. Did well with the previous couple, I threw quite a bit of worms onto them and made sure they got into their clothes,” the former setter grinned as Osamu let out a high pitched scream. He didn’t think twice as he snatched Akaashi by the hand, dragging him out of the room as soon as he dropped the worms onto the ground. He could still feel their slimy long bodies on his palm as they ran, Akaashi yelling at him to slow down but he couldn’t care less. They dashed past what were supposed to be ghosts, Osamu even nailing some of them in the groins to get out of there. One ghost that was supposed to be a killer clown ran in the opposite direction when he saw the duo heading towards him, shouting for them to spare him until Osamu finally managed to get outside.

“Hey, take a breath,” Akaashi whispered as Osamu let out a rattled breath. His body was shaking as he finally realised he was outside, the night sky hanging above his head as Akaashi wrapped his arms around him. The rest of the trip had been a blur, Osamu just wanting to head home and sleep off the whole damn thing as Akaashi wrapped his arms around him.

“Come on Sumu. Let’s go home.”  
  


Never in his life will Miya Osamu ever go to a haunted house ever again.

**Bonus:**

Miya Atsumu thought he would get to impress his boyfriend by bringing him to the scariest haunted house and showing him how brave he was. He had even brought some necessary items in case they wanted to go at it, his grin widening as he thought of Suna panting against him, his legs clutched around his waist as they kissed. Oho, nothing was better than doing it in public spaces like this. The thrill of being caught just made him want to do it even more.

Instead, Atsumu found himself screaming at the top of his lungs as he was showered with a bucket of worms. Yes, real worms that wriggled and got into his clothes. He screamed as Suna shouted profanities, trying to get the worms out of his hair as the actor in front laughed at them, “I remember you two. I’ve been waiting a long time to do shit to you for trashing my team on the court.”

Both boys ended up running out of the haunted house half-naked in a mad attempt to make sure the worms were out of their skin. Atsumu was even peeing in his pants, not even caring that Suna was dragging him out and begging him to stop peeing as the setter sobbed. Security had to be called to escort them out when they found both players lying on the asphalt only in their boxers, grunting things about worms and a mad doctor before being thrown out.

“Well well, Shirabu. I didn’t think you would go that far to scare the customers,” Tendou mused as Shirabu shrugged, “Those aren’t even real worms. You think I would actually bring the real thing into the building? Please.”

“Well setting that aside, I think social media would be having a hell of a time dealing with how stupid V League players can look when scared shitless,” Tendou smirked as he swiped through several photos from the various cameras he placed around the house. He had thought of setting up a photo business for customers who wanted to get photos when they were scared shitless but most of them had ended up running outside and never staying long enough to get the pictures.

Tendou grinned as he tucked the pictures away in his pocket, thinking of how he was going to surprise Ushijima with those later that day.

Ah, nothing better than scaring the living daylights out of people, especially people who had trashed his team on the court in volleyball all those years ago.

**Author's Note:**

> I just had to throw Shirabu in there being a student in need of cash and just wanting to make life hell for people visiting the haunted house haha!
> 
> Come yell at me on Tumblr or Twitter @runningfromrealitytoanime.
> 
> Please leave some kudos and comments! They really make my day!


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